I woke up on my "guess date" which is also my Dad's birthday and felt a little pressure, but I knew I couldn't think about it. I went into the office, and had a few meetings that lasted till about noon. I went to the restroom and felt a little leakage and I am thinking to myself "NO WAY this is my water breaking at work on my Guess date". I waited a few minutes and then knew this was the real deal, instead of freaking out like my male co-worker did when I told him what was going on, I calmly told my boss"my water broke, and I will have my baby within 24 hours...YAY" and drove home. When I got home I called my hypnobirthing instructor Carol to fill her in on our status, she was able to give me the reassurance I needed to stay at home until I felt comfortable and wish us well in our birthing experience. I think I even mentioned while on the phone with Carol that it was just good to hear her voice because it was just what I needed at the time of uncertainty. We stayed and labored at home in bed with Louie (our 3lb Chihuahua) by my side till about 7pm, I wanted to stay at home later, but it was rainy out and with traffic we decided it would be best to go get settled at the hospital.
When we arrived at the hospital my Mom brought cookies and coffee for the staff and we got checked in, my doctor was at the hospital that night so we were so happy and relieved that she would be delivering our little man. When we got settled in I had Adam read the balloon trip script to relieve any anxious feelings I was having and it definitely helped me to be calm. I decided to use the Hep lock instead of IV and was happy to be able to frequent the toilet and be able to walk around the halls in my little labor gown I bought online and my furry Uggs without something attached to me.Things started progressing around 12:20am and I had my IPOD in my ear with my rainbow relaxation on repeat the whole time and Adam reading my scripts to keep me calm. I got checked and I was 5 cm dilated. I had both Adam and my Mom there doing whatever they could to keep me comfortable they were truly "MY DREAM TEAM". Things started moving quickly and I had the urge to push around 1:40 am, so the doctor checked me and I was 9 cm dilated. At this point not pushing was the hardest thing to do, but my "Dream Team" encouraged me to blow whenever I wanted to push. I went to the toilet so many times I thought he would have been delivered on the toilet. Finally I reached 10 cm and was able to push, this was such a relief and it actually felt good. After about 40 minutes of pushing, I was able to reach out for my baby!!!! After Papi Bear cut the chord and we just stared at him and both felt a love like no other. It was the most surreal experience and I was so happy that it had gone exactly as planned, it was truly beautiful... It felt so good to bring Aiden into this world naturally and to accomplish my goal. I could not have been so relaxed and pain free without my amazing husband and Mom, they were by my side the whole time helping me with whatever I needed.
What happened next was not part of the plan, but thanks to my hypnobirthing classes I took I remained calm throughout the next sequence of events. One minute I was enjoying my new baby and family, and then the next minute the doctor had a very concerned look on her face and was covered in blood. The first time I had really felt the pain was when she had to put her whole hand inside my uterus to try to stop the bleeding. My doctor then informed me that I was hemorrhaging so bad that I may have to have an emergency hysterectomy...here I am thinking "this was the most amazing experience and then this is happening right now? This must be a nightmare, and I am not going to be able to have any more kids? My mind was racing and all I could do was go back to my place of focus, think positive and be thankful that I have my son, husband and family all there supporting me. I had to be rushed into the OR at that point no discussion, no talking about options. I was frightened and just wanted to be with my baby.
